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Fat Tuesday

No, it's not Mardis Gras. But this Tuesday really felt fat. I had what can only be described as a fiasco at the gym this afternoon. Let me start at the beginning.

I have been trying to renew my efforts to exercise on a regular basis. So I, like the wide-eyed optimist I am (at least when I am still riding the high of deciding to take on something new) I went to the gym's website to look at the group fitness schedule. And there it was. Kickboxing! And I thought, "This will be perfect. I have been badgering N. to get me a punching bag, and this will be a great way to empower myself and get in shape." So I decided I would definitely go. I was pumped. So pumped that I didn't even hesitate when it came time to change clothes and drive to the gym.

Then the first disaster struck. I couldn't find my workout pants. Now, I have a lot of sweatpants. I love workout clothes. But the way workout clothes feel when you are lounging in them and how they feel when you are using them for their intended purpose are two completely different things. But I have one pair of pants that are perfect for both lounging and for actually moving around. They are from Target, and they are black and stretchy with a white stripe around the waistband. They fit me perfectly and stay right where I put them the whole time I am jumping around. But this day, the day of my return to the gym, the day I try my new empowering exercise, the pants were nowhere to be found. Nowhere. So, with mere minutes to get to the gym, I settled or a different pair of black pants. These have a drawstring and do not stay where I put them when I move. Even when I am just walking around my house. But I didn't have a choice.

I got to the gym and got a little winded walking up the stairs, but I did not lose heart. I was going to kickboxing. I got to the group fitness room and took stock of the other participants. Blonde. Thin. Perky boobs. Tank tops. I was the only person there wearing baggy black pants and a ratty t-shirt. But whatever. They could suck it. I was here to lose weight, right? So, okay. I could do this.

Class started. The instructor suggested I get five pound weights, so I did. We started the class by punching the air with our weights. This was hard, but punching the air was satisfying. Then we got to do some more punching without the weights. This lasted for about five minutes. Then, I suppose, the real class began. Which constituted about forty minutes of squats, push-ups, and jumping jacks (during which my pants rode down--stupid wrong pants--and my shirt rode up, so I could see my belly jiggling with every bounce). I was miserable. I felt like crying, but crying in addition to being the biggest girl in class, the one with the puffy red face and the back sweat, seemed just too undignified. So I held it in.

I made it through the class, but it was not at all what I expected. I was so pumped during the punching part. I imagined hitting people I hated, thought about beating up random attackers, and was super jazzed. But the squats and push-ups part sucked. Not in a "this was a good workout and my body hurts but I know it was good for me" type way, but in a "I could have done this at home without the pain and humiliation" way.

I will probably go back. I fully anticipate being miserable every time, but N. assures me that if I can endure it for 21 days it will get easier, and might even be fun. And I can already feel my muscles getting sore, so that is probably a good thing. Tomorrow is Zumba though, and I am looking forward to that a lot more. And I will have to remember to wear an extra sports bra, because those dance moves are no joke.

Also, despite my distress this afternoon, I have lost six pounds since I began this odyssey, so it is uplifting to know I am making progress. Have you made progress in your goals? Tried anything new or interesting at the gym? Share your wisdom, fellow workout-ers!

Comments

  1. The cardio kickboxing class I went to a few days ago sounds like it was a lot more fun. I sympathize with feeling out of place though. One thing that has helped me was making a goal on loseit.com (and having friends on the site to keep me accountable) then regularly logging food and exercise. Helps me realize how much I'm eating vs burning. I also love pilates and walking outside in nice weather.

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  2. You will love zumba! Well, I do. And I've never been a fan of the gym. Zumba is the only workout I've ever stuck with for longer than a few days. So I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

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  3. Okay, take this with a grain of salt because I'm too cheap to pay for a gym membership, so I have never been to a gym and therefore don't REALLY know what it's like, nor would I ever have the guts to join a kickboxing OR zumba class.

    BUT, as someone who has in the last year become interested in physical health and fitness as well, here are the two things I have to say in response to your post:

    1) If you're there to lose weight, keep it up. In my experience (which is with runners, not gym-goers, but I would hope it would be the same everywhere), nobody cares about size or skill or speed. The only thing people care about is the fact that you're DOING it. And just think about how, some weeks down the road, you'll be able to look in the mirror when your shirt is riding up and see that your belly isn't jiggling as much as it was when you first started because there isn't as much there TO jiggle!

    2) You should DEFINITELY go back. Sure, you can "do the workout at home without the pain and humiliation," but WOULD you? And anyway, isn't a workout without pain not really much of a workout?

    I say these things to make this point: Keep doing it. It'll get easier. And when it does, you'll know that it's time to amp it up and challenge yourself even more. You have a great goal, and if you keep it in mind, you can't fail. I'm proud of you. :)

    -audra-

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  4. buy an enell sports bra! it's like fort knox. when i bought it last year, it completely revamped my workout. i can do jumping jacks and my girls do not move. at. all.

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